National Broadband

McCambridge’s Bakery awarded National broadband contract

The government have announced that John McCambridge’s bakery have been awarded  the National Broadband contract after they came out on top against all the other bidders.

Minister for Communications, Climate Action and Environment Richard Bruton said they were the logical choice as they have been “putting fibre into their bread for years”. He added “after all the shite talking that went on, we could have had this sorted years ago. Sure we never thought that just a bit of bread and butter would do the job”.

He also told scallionaeter.com off the record “Sure don’t be heeding that gobshite Pascal Donohue as there is no need to be spending billions on this type of plan when all you need is a bit of fibre”. We promised not to print this, but of course we lied.

Old Mr Brennan wasn’t too happy when he found out that his rival got the contract and when contacted for comment he told us “I hope he choked on his Gluten Free, Wha” This was followed by his usual dirty old man laugh.

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