Valet parking at new childrens hospital

The HSE has announced that the new children’s hospital will have valet style parking just like all the fancy hotels in Vegas.

The charges are part of the HSE’s bright idea to offset the spiriling build costs “and no, Medical card holders will not get any free parking as they will just have to cough up like the rest of us” said Minister Harris.

The Minister and a team of HSE management, their families, in laws and distant relatives will fly to Las Vegas on an exploratory mission and bring back their findings after a couple of months.

A spokeswoman for the HSE said that “recruitment will start soon and candidates can expect to earn a starting salary of €85K per year plus tips…although Nurses need not apply.”

Local Fine Gael TD Maria Bailey said “I’m absolutely incredulous because as far as I’m concerned my brother had the contract for the parking at the hospital and now has to cancel his daughter’s lavish wedding planned for 2025 in Dubai” adding that it was “”scandalous”.

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