Since prehistory, the Summer Solstice has been seen as a significant time of year in many cultures especially the Irish and that of the Fine Gael party. Fine Gael were founded in 1933 after the amalgamation of a number of groups they continue to perform their summer and winter rituals as performed by their forefathers the Celtic Druids.
This year the Fine Gael lads and ladies will gather at at secret location at The Hill of Tara in County Meath dressed in their druid’s cloaks especially made by Louis Copeland. (No expense spared)
This year they will pray to the Celtic God “Tuatha De Danann” (The performer of Feats) Leo Varadkar will lead the group in a chant asking for the impossible task of keeping the current government going amid all the crisis after crisis in the party. They will strip naked and perform the chicken shit ritual where they rub chicken shit all over their naked bodies and dance around a blazing bonfire.
As with health and safety regulations Meath County Council will have Navan fire service on standby along with the Order of Malta ambulance service who also have lots of baby wipes to help with the chicken poo.
Scallionater News 