EuroMillions Winner

Lotto fever
Local lad wins big

Recent Euro Millions winner Gareth McHaggart from the small midland  town of Ballygoreen Co Laois

He said he was delighted to win such a massive amount of money and plans to have a mad party to celebrate. “I can’t really imagine what I can spend 90 million Euros on.

Oh Ya a yacht is definitely something I always wanted. You know the type you see in the Bond movies with the scantly clad models on the deck Yah that’s me all over. Mega

Local tidy towns chairperson Maureen Foley said “We are delighted to hear that Gareth won the money he has been a great asset to the tidy towns here and we wish him well and maybe he will donate some money for the cause”

When we asked Gareth would he be donating anything to the local causes especially the Tidy Towns?  His reply was “Well they can fucking sing for it they won’t be getting a cent from me I had to buy the tea and biscuits when we were doing the tidy up and I never got paid for them , So NO, they can feck off  the miserable shites  and  just to let the public know that any begging letters or emails and personal calls looking for money for good causes there won’t be any because I plan to live it up large. Drink, cocaine I’m gonna live the rock ‘n roll lifestyle expensive hookers and gambling.

Gareth is currently been treated for a range of sexually transmitted diseases and alcohol problems.

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