The Irish leprechaun industry is in turmoil after Kerry TD Danny Healy-Rae said that leprechauns don’t exist. Head of the Irish Leprechaun Union Seamus Mc Seamus said “Well feck him the shitehawk we do exist and to show him we are actually real we are going to give him a suprise at his pub in Kilgarvan” next friday morning, He won’t be expecting it.

Kerry tourism said “This is bad for rural Ireland and the tourist industry we have been selling the Yanks Leprechaun shite for years and they love it”. said Frank Boylan of the Kerry tourist board said ” I think Mr Healy Rea should hang his head in shame and remove himself from public office”.
Fellow Kerry native and Seanchaí (storyteller) Eddie Lenihan said “If I was him I would be very very afraid, sure you don’t want to be messing with the Leprchauns or the fairies strange things happen.
The surprise that Seamus spoke of was that Mr Healy Rae found a shite in his shoe on friday morning and all that was heard was an angry garble coming for the pub. But local villagers said “That’s how he normally speaks anyway”.